@daddyfreeze
I saw this piece written on my facebook wall, by my sister Lola (PHD) and i decided to share;
"I still play over these events and wonder how we got here. The human mind is such an awesome creation, alas when detached from love [read God] it's creativity becomes destructive. As Mark Twain humorously put it, I have been through many terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened. When people make up stories about domestic violence, they are hindering rather than helping the process and others who are really facing difficulties. Their patterns being inconsistent with other's, they create confusion for those who are really in violent relationships. Here is a resource about what is likely to happen as one partner tries to control another and becomes abusive. http://www.pbs.org/inthemix/educators/lessons/abusiverelationships_guide.html Please always be attentive and help anyone who is in an abusive situation. Never victimise the victim by putting them down. While we have a long way to go in Nigeria on accpetable limits to asserting one's position as the 'man in the house' , we have since had some cultural and social setting that can be applied curtail domestic violence. Close family ties, culturally engaging in a proper marriage and close ties between married families, are all outlets for those caught in trouble to quickly seek help. For this reason foreigners including other ethnic groups are more at risk and find it more difficult to get out of a violent situation. This is getting me personally interested in victims of abuse. #SayNoToDomesticViolence. I am sure of this, my brother is not a monster! I am sure, our wife (Benedicta) is a kind hearted person. Also no person would tie knots with someone wicked enough to ridicule another woman and openly wish her out of her marriage. I met Benedicta long after I begged Ope to stay and she left. I remember telling her we loved her and she was making up ideas about us feeling anything but love for her. Apparently, she doesn't know Ifedayo, or any of us for that matter. and i am sorry that somehow she felt so unloved. I pray she finds love and healing. We are praying for Light." ~Lola
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